Oh, So it’s Going to be One of Those Mornings


The kind where your kid wakes up kind of crabby and you’re not sure why. And then proceeds to get in your face about every.little.thing. And won’t leave you alone so you can get ready and instead starts wailing about everything.

The kind of morning where you’re underneath your bathroom sink. You know, underneath there, way in the back, where you never go, but you store lots of extra stuff, like hair care products and makeup that you never use. Including the extra big pads that you don’t use except in very specific situations, such as the “just getting home from the hospital after having a baby,” situation. And it’s a nearly full bag of pads. Because, as I mentioned, you only use them in very specific situations. Since I’m almost 9 months pregnant and anticipating the need for said pads in the very near future, I was glad to pull them out. Except I discovered that they were wet. Because they had absorbed water from an apparent leak from my bathroom sink. Again. Yes, this has happened before. The pads were huge. And did I mention wet? Nasty. Not to mention now I have to go buy a new package of extra big pads, of which I’ll use several and then toss under the sink for the next leak. Yeah, that kind of morning.

The kind of morning where after you clean up the water underneath your bathroom sink, which also involves entertaining a very curious, and don’t forget cranky, toddler, whilst cleaning up the water, you still have to get said cranky toddler changed, dressed, brushed and out the door. Just TRY to run away from me child. See how far you get. Oh, you don’t want to wear that vest? Okay, that’s fine. Then why are you SCREAMING when I take the vest off? Why are you saying, “Night. Night.” Do you want to go “Night. Night?” I’m so confused.

It’s one of those mornings where I am in deep deliberation about whether it will take me longer to get one ornery toddler’s coat, shoes and hat on, while 9 months pregnant with my pants falling off, having to pee, and child in utero making a concerted effort to push her foot out my stomach. OR, to get TWO children dressed, outside and buckled in car seats without being pregnant. Seriously, who can tell me? I really need to know. Because I literally have no idea how I’m going to manage to get out of the house before 10 a.m., and I’m hoping beyond hope, that it will be less cumbersome when I’m not pregnant, but with two kids. PLEASE?

Right, so after I get the toddler to Nana’s house and get back home, and am starving, it’s one of those mornings where I break the fried egg WIDE open after flipping it, and burn the toast. You know, because the toaster never toasts the bread enough on the first go around, so you pop it down again, only for the damn toaster to burn it. I’m still hungry.

(SIGH). Deep breath.

I’m hoping for a better afternoon.

Hey, the sun’s out!


About Jen

On the Night You Were Born is my attempt to chronicle my joys and frustrations of parenthood. I’m fairly new to the mommy blogosphere, and I read some brilliantly-funny mom blogs, so I hope to be half as witty, insightful, and I won’t say inspiring. The only thing I hope to inspire is for my 4k kid to cut the sass and my 2.5-year-old to stop being disruptive at bedtime. Alas, they both come with time.

4 responses »

  1. My vote is that it will be more difficult with two to get ready and out of the door in the morning. And yes, toasters always do that! Why do they always do that? You would think that they could get it right!

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