Before I was a mom, when I would watch my friends who were moms, I would marvel at the intense connection they had with their kids that seemed to develop overnight. It was so amazing to watch the kids look at their mom, like she was their everything. The person they would run to when they were hurt or happy, or needed protection.
I would wonder, how does that happen? I mean, my friends were good moms, don’t get me wrong — but these were my girlfriends. The friends I played soccer with in high school and went out drinking with in college — it’s not like they practiced being a mom. How did they go from being PR professional, or physician’s assistant, or event planner, to MOM — someone’s everything?
Once Monkey was born, I understood better — I felt that instant connection to her. That attachment. She was mine. She was part of me, and created in me. And after months of mothering, I realized my misperception — you don’t become your kids’ everything overnight. It happens through the caring and the nurturing. The holding, the rocking, the singing. From the endless diaper changes, the late-night feedings, the smiles, the laughs, the giggles. It’s the hugs, the kisses on the owies, reading the stories at bedtime, cutting up their food, changing their clothes, the sillies, the discipline. It’s teaching them the alphabet and how to count to 10, and pointing out trees, and birds, and airplanes, and school buses. Day, after day, after day. It’s everything.
You become their everything over time. And it’s amazing. I feel so lucky and blessed to have this honor. I will always be the one they run to when they’re hurt, the first one they call with good news and bad. We will always be connected. I will always be their mom; their one, their everything. And they will always be my daughters. Nothing can ever change that. And to have that type of irreplaceable connection with another human being, is remarkable.
Happy Mother’s Day to all my beautiful friends who are someone’s everything.